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By Zachary D. Campbell, Lawyer at Metzger Wickersham
Currently, most people would agree that society as a whole tends to be overstressed given the state of affairs and the ongoing pandemic in America. Unfortunately, a side effect of stress is a greater level of bullying not only among children, but also adults. School-age children tend to mimic adult behaviors which has the effect of sometimes escalating minor disputes into major bullying situations. One out of every five (20.2%) school-age children report being bullied. Of those children who reported being bullied,
Bullying is a pattern of behavior, rather than an isolated incident; this is not surprising given the bickering we see between adults both in real life and on TV. Lack of civility seems to be a major problem in today’s society, which can been seen within the legal field as well. Lawyers can often display a lack of civility to their opponents. However, it is morally a lawyer’s job in addition to adults to set better examples for our youth. In order to help educate and raise awareness of bullying prevention, October is designated as National Bullying Prevention Month.
Children who are bullied are more likely to experience:
This also can lead to further problems later in life. Children who are subjected to bullying tend to have a higher rate of substance abuse. Bullying cannot be written off as a “rite of passage” or “part of growing up.” Bullying can have serious consequences not only for the victim but also the bully themselves. Bullying is a behavior, not an identity. Labeling as child as a “bully” can have a detrimental effect on their future and often limits their ability to change their behavior (StopBullying.gov, 2016 ).
As adults, we must set examples of what is appropriate and inappropriate behavior. To access information and strategies to advocate for your child, visit The National Bullying Prevention Center’s website. Learn how to address and prevent peer to peer bullying and promote kindness, acceptance, and inclusion.
If you discover that your child is being bullied, you may feel a variety of emotions, from anger to fear to sadness. According to The Center, these reactions and emotional responses are natural for parents who want their child to feel valued, protected, and loved. To become an effective advocate for your child, it is important to acknowledge your emotions and then focus on developing an action plan to help your child.
When you first talk with your child about bullying, be prepared to listen without judgment, and provide a safe and supportive place where your child can work out his or her feelings. Children may not be ready to open up right away as they, too, are dealing with the emotional effects of bullying and may be feeling insecure, frightened, vulnerable, angry, or sad. When your child begins to tell their story, just listen and avoid making judgmental comments. It is important to listen and encourage your child to talk. Let them know you are there to help and they are not alone.
7 Things to Teach Children About Bullying
As a parent looking for solutions, it’s important not only to be informed, but also to have a plan. Whether your child is being bullied, witnessing bullying, or bullying others, you can help them create a plan to change their situation.
By allowing them to help in creating the action plan, you can build self confidence in your child. These strategies can be utilized to work with the strengths and abilities your child already has in place. However, there are certain reactions that the Center recommends to avoid.
As a society, our youth are our most important asset. It is our responsibility to make sure bullying is stopped. There is no place for it. Bullying is about control with the intent to hurt, harm, or humiliate. Teaching respect, kindness, acceptance, inclusion, and empathy should begin at a very early age. Instilling these concepts along with messages on tolerance are important for younger children to learn how to maintain positive relationships. It is not too late for adults to learn these healthy behaviors as well. Taking a step back is the most important advice we can give to our extremely stressed society. Having a conflict or a difference of opinion is not the same as bullying. We can all disagree on things but it should never escalate to the level of bullying.
As we move towards 2021, Metzger Wickersham encourages our community to work together to end bullying and to help build a better society for our children’s future.
